1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time....I know where my watch is pal, where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Fucking right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the fuck would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No tosser, I paid 10 quid to come to the cinema and stare at the fucking floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". Didn't really give me a choice there, did you sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

8. When people say "life is short". What bollox?? Life is the longest bloody thing anyone ever fucking does!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, nobhead?

10. People who say things like 'My eyes aren't what they used to be'. So what did they used to be? Ears, Wellington boots?

11. When you're eating something and someone asks 'Is that nice?' No it's really revolting - I always eat stuff I hate.

12. People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that's an image I really didn't need.

13. McDonalds staff who pretend they don't understand you if you don't insert the 'Mc' before the item you are ordering..... It has to be a McChicken Burger, just a Chicken Burger gets blank looks. Well I'll have a McStraw, and I'll jam it in your fucking McEyes you fucking McTosser.

I agree with ceila.

1.terrestial tv

2.people ask for money or ask you to buy them a train ticket

3.people play with their phones and have the most stupid conversations known to man and the shitty ringtones people have

4.BBC

5.glory hunters

6.daily mirror say tories are hipocrytes read their bloody stories say labour are the worst leaders when Blair admits he resgins they say what a great leader

7.Tesco personal reasons

8.people bad mouth the unemployed you'll see hard it is when your out of work it is not easy or fun

9.go to a shop and the assistant says can I help with you anything

10. des o connor false laugh and tan

11. the word loo is a toliet or john or bog

12. prices at train stations and motorway service

13. groups that are manafutred and no instruments in sight.

have you noticed how the people that take the longest to answer their mobile are the ones with the most annoying ringtone....AAAAAAARGGGHHHHHHHHH

"3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Fucking right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it? "

You misunderstand the statement.

Consider "You can't eat your cake and have it" Grasshopper

..actually no I won`t I can only agree, but I can add to the Mcburger list.
When I have to suffer one of these dreadful items, in those horrible buildings, I allways scan behind the counter to see which dispicable soggy rag is actually available and choose that one so that I can leave as quickly as possible.
As this point, the Mcstaff member, turns the coloured wrapper on it`s side, reads a coded message, throws it in the bin, and shouts "one Mccheese please!!!", which you duly receive twenty minutes later.
And talking of Mcstraws, who the hell has the lung power to actually extract the milk shake out of the gayly coloured paper carton?
oooh! and Little Chef free refills on coffee! Well they are pretty safe on that one arn`t they? I didnt like the first one much. I suffer a lot in there as it opposite the studio, and they have an irritating habit of spraying the table with a bleach like substance whilst you are eating.
Right who is next??

1) Stuff that falls out of papers and magazines.

2) Covermounts!

3) Predictable newspaper headlines (though How Can We Solve A Problem Like Korea made me giggle).

4) People "assuming" things.

5) Obvious campaigns for music.

6) Junk food.

7) Mobile phones - when I came out after 3 and a half mobile free years, everyone looked like Munch's The Scream - one hand clamped to one ear with mobile; the other clamped over the other to cut out noise; mouths gaping open like goldfish... has the world gone mad, I wondered?

8) Traffic - the second huge advantage of prison; no traffic jams!

9) Bills - and the third; no bills!

10) Computer controlled telephone services where you can NEVER speak to everyone, have to press buttons and inevitably get cut off after 10 pointless minutes.

1. chavs
2. chavs
3. chavs
4. chavs
5. chavs
6. chavs
7. chavs
8. chavs
9. chavs
10.chavs
11.chavs
12.chavs
13.fuckin burberry wearin fuckwit british chavs.

AAAAAARGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Last week I sold my beloved old burberry interior Austin to a Mcburger worker.
Is this the start of the McChav, and does it come as a fries?

Here's a couple of mine that I've experienced first hand over the last few days.

1 - People who wear huge backpacks and take out 3 complete strangers when they turn around. One of those 3 strangers always seems to be me BTW.

2 - People who add, "Anywhere nice?" to the end of asking where you're going on holiday:-

"Where are you going, anywhere nice?"
"No, I booked the worst f**kin' place I could!"

3 - People who say, "Sorry, it was a geniune mistake". So normally these people make mistakes on purpose?

4 - People who see someone they know and say, "It's a small world". They probably see 1,000's of people a day that they've never seen before in they're life but they don't say, "I've never met you before, what a big world!"

OK, the last one I knicked from a comedian, it's bloody true though!

Only one thing pissing me off at the mo! I've started my own business but while it builds up I still have to be in my old job (bills to pay, etc). So I'm sitting here bored with no work when I could be out doing more important stuff! Grrrr!!!

Oh, and people who work in my office who speak too loudly on the phone....why bother using the phone, people from miles around can still hear you!! Grrr again!!!

1. The Caps Lock button on the computer which makes aLL yOUR tEXT lOOK lIKE tHIS (sO yOU hAVE T rETYPE iT). (Why is it there?)

2. The Government telling me I have to put booster seats back in my car (even though I sold ours 3 years ago)

3. Bland music / Rap music / Screamo music

4. People who say 'I personally think ...'

5. Spitting

6. People who aren't polite

7. Chavs (agree wholeheartedly)

8. Poncey restaurants (mainly in London) where the food is mediocre but the prices are high and the staff are haughty.

9. Spam emails (I spend the first hour of every day checking through the 'spam' file and finding the odd genuine one in there and then deleting all the rest.)
Think there's a law against it in the UK - but why does the US still allow it?

10. People (mainly in the music business) who don't answer emails or calls.



Stretch
www.Dastards.com

check the t shirt on the left


www.chavscum.co.uk/4images/

Thats brilliant! Once again I lose out to the god of Ronaldism!

One I forgot...


Websites that carry that Make Poverty History flash on the corner.

WANKERS!!!