One of my toilets (I have several - SOOO chic) has a nice warm wooden seat but one side came loose and the seat started sliding all over the place. Thanks to my local handy hardware shop (been there for over 50 years) I got new screws, washers, bolts. Down on my knees in front of the lavatory (haven't done that for years, Ibiza fans). Within seconds all mended! Now I can shit in comfort.

What an exciting life I lead in this CoronaVirus world!

A while ago, visiting a relation's home, I encountered that strange phenomenon, the slow-moving toilet seat. I guess I see the logic during night time - you don't want a noisy slamming sound as you put the lid up or down - but during the day?? For blokes it's hazardous - you urgently need to pee, the seat's down, you have to nudge it up and then stand there hopping as it moves at the pace of some old oil tanker. Or you urgently need the seat to come down, and again it's like waiting for a kettle to boil! I don't get them at all!

Yes and I had a brand new toilet put in years ago (can't remember why) with one of those electric buttons on it to flush; invariably weak and often needs several subsequent flushes. As opposed to the much better old one (55 years old) with a nice, solid, hefty handle that pushes down and works far better.

I went to a lot of trouble to get an older discontinued style of toilet because they have a better flush, but the fittings for the toilet seats dont quite match so they work themselves loose and every few months I slide off.

Now you just need to find some bog roll and you're sorted.

Oh Robbie don't even joke! I am seriously contemplating getting some flannels and a bucket with a lid. If there are several people in the house and only one of you is fit enough to go shopping, what good are the four rolls you are allowed on your ration?

I really really wish I had been a stockpiling idiot.

If this happens again I am going to get a removal van and buy up the whole of Morrisons.

Honey wrote:
Oh Robbie don't even joke! I am seriously contemplating getting some flannels and a bucket with a lid. If there are several people in the house and only one of you is fit enough to go shopping, what good are the four rolls you are allowed on your ration?

I really really wish I had been a stockpiling idiot.

If this happens again I am going to get a removal van and buy up the whole of Morrisons.

I'm sorry to hear that you are genuinely short and have a genuine need to buy more than the ration, however if people shopped normally as they are now required to do, then stocks should return soon, as there is no shortage of supply, only people been greedy. It makes you ashamed to be british sometimes.

The lack of toilet roll has paled into insignificance.
Now there is no cat litter in the shops and I don't think I can train them to use flannels and buckets.