A joke or serious?

penned by Keir Starmer or Tom Watson?

Funny, but the wrong way around.

Like all criminal justice and other public bodies the policy is created top down with the ministry (of justice in this case) directing a Gov quango to direct the police areas to implement a directive and then hold them accountable for implementation and target-performance.

The management board of the MET will be told what they have to implement first, and then direct operations to come up with a local plan.

Your doc rather sweetly assumes a lot of policy power in the hands of the local police area. For police area feel free to swap social services/housing/probation/prison/courts etc.