In "the only poll that matters" (how can everyone go on using cliches?) we are facing a truly dreadful musical Eurovision.

'Twas ever thus, cynics will say. Wrong.

Not only has the show produced arguably one of the great bands of all time (Abba) and some superb hits (Non Ho L'Eta) but some wonderful tracks - Ooh Aah Just A Little Bit - and some massive winners - Love Shine A Light.

But this year is ghastly and the British entry one of the worst ever; up there with Scooch and Jemini.