Here are a few of my pet hates for 2009 {well, OK, they're much more long standing than that, but I'm sure you catch my drift...}. I decided that, as this year marks the beginning of a new decade I'd resolve not to let them wind me up any more.

1. People who, despite having the language of Shakespeare at their fingertips, can't even manage to put apostrophes in the right place.

2. People who believe that they have a divine right to drive - regardless of speed, heaviness or lightness of traffic, or time of day or night - exclusively in the centre lane of any given motorway.

3. People who refuse to obey any common or decent form of grammatical construction when posting on internet fora. Thankfully this board is {apart from BR's exceptionally sticky caps lock} remarkably free of this particular crime against the English Language.

4. People who blame the tendency to be a drunken arsehole on the availablity of alcohol. It's not the drink that makes them arseholes, is the way they think - and the fact that they're arseholes - that makes them arseholes.

5. Not becoming irrational when introducing a bare foot to cats' vomit first thing in the morning.

I freely admit that each and every one of these resolutions has already been broken. Apart from Number 2. And I guess that's simply a matter of time.

And it's only the 7th of January. I am, it's clear, as useless as I have always been at sticking to my guns. Anyone having any better luck with their own NYRs?

I've only ever kept to two of muy resolutions

1) Giving up alcohol - 20 years

2) Stop smoking - 2 years

After giving up both of the above I figure I've been punished enough lol